acceptable pet names:
- babe
- baby
- sweetie
- cutie pie
- darling
- honey
unacceptable pet names:
- boo boo sweetie oojy woojy poogy poo
- cthulu
- sweet devil prince in the pale moon light
- Leslie
- floor
- 2% milk
- Ella Fitzgerald
i think you have these mixed up
(via animalcrackersinmyblog)
What’s the difference between being hungry and horny?
where you put the cucumber
(via animalcrackersinmyblog)
I think my sink is clogged
get out.
I think I need to go to bed because I laughed a lot
(Source: hectoringthoughts)
WHEN PEOPLE LIKE AND REBLOG STUFF THAT IS HIDDEN DEEP IN THE CAVERNS OF YOUR BLOG’S PAST AND YOU’RE LIKE “WHERE THE FUCK DID YOU COME FROM HOW DID YOU GET THERE”
(Source: poonchka, via animalcrackersinmyblog)
im going to find a way to delete every picture of me that has ever existed except for this one and then im going to fake my own death in a really shocking way so that it makes national news and then media outlets will have no pictures of me besides this one to use causing this picture to be on televisions and newspapers across the nation
(Source: earthnation, via legendofsherlock)
“I’M FALLING TRUST ME”
i laughed so hard i need to get up and pee
(Source: videohall, via neutralizedmilkhotel)
SHIT.
JUST.
GOT.
REAL.she calls him “sam”
not his full name but “sam”
(Source: femburton, via fatpeoplemakemehappy)